July 4th is a holiday
That Americans adore
A celebration of freedom
With red, white, & blue galore
Barbecues and country music,
Burgers, hot dogs, apple pie
The constant boom of fireworks
Sparkling colors in the sky
Block parties and family picnics
Are traditions every year
Floating & swimming in the lake
Playing lawn games, drinking beer
An afternoon spent on the beach
And enjoying the outdoors
Evenings around the campfire
Telling jokes and making S’mores
What should normally be a fun day
Is instead one that I dread
Forever tainted by my past
And the flashbacks in my head
July third, two thousand seven
At an innocent sixteen
I flew from O’Hare to Frankfurt
Unprepared for the next scene
I was sexually assaulted
By the soldier on my right
Somewhere over the Atlantic
In the middle of the night
It’s hard to give an exact date
Switching time zones in the sky
But by the time the plane landed
It was the Fourth of July
The holiday and tragedy
Fused together in my brain
Patriotic celebrations
Have come to signify pain
It gets harder each year to smile
And pretend that I am fine
I’ve spent far too long suppressing
All the demons in my mind
Written July 3, 2021
Talking Through Trauma 