Month: July 2020

The Haunting Aftermath

Sara RutherfordLeave a comment 
Fading dreams, a stolen youth
Come at far too high a cost
Amid a sea of self doubt
Her innocence was lost

Her world has lost its color
And food has lost all taste
Her passions seem but pointless
And life feels like a waste

Now her mind feels paralyzed
Stuck in a moment in time
Hoping, longing for relief
For justice for this crime

But justice may never come
And vengeance isn't sweet
If the demons in her mind
Cannot admit defeat

Silently she drudges on
A shell of who she was
He still haunts her memories
And everything she does

Edited June 7, 2020

The Fear in Posting My Traumas

Sara RutherfordLeave a comment 
You are scared to post your trauma
Detailing it makes it real
But sharing your experience
Is the only way to heal

It's hard to process your assault
With thoughts swirling in your head
And nobody who understands
All the memories you dread

You don't want to be a victim
Or a martyr for the cause
But you’re done being complicit
When it feels like life’s on “pause”

You’re afraid of people’s judgments
And their doubts and misplaced blame
So you’ve been bottling the past
And then living life ashamed

The details are very graphic
And the topic is taboo
People try to understand it
But end up avoiding you

The internet is permanent
And everything can be tracked
So once your stories are out there
There’s no way to take them back

You’ll lose all sense of privacy
With your whole life on display
But you need to share your trauma
So the guilt will go away

Written June 2020